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- Peter Bronson,
- The Cincinnati Enquirer
-
- It's political viability stupid
-
- Watching President Clinton try to talk us into a war by lecturing
- Haiti about lying to America, I decided his TV speeches should carry
- scrolling subtitles like severe weather warnings:
-
- "BEEP, BEEP, BEEP--Take cover. Be alert for an unstable mass of hot
- air accompanied by damaging high winds that could blow in any
- direction."
-
- Right now, Hurricane Bill is blowing at Haiti. By the time this is in
- your driveway, we may already be at war--or Clinton might have said
- "Never mind," and sent the dastardly dictators on a one-way free trip
- to the Riviera.
-
- Clinton insists that if we back down, our foreign policy will be in a
- shambles.
-
- How would anyone notice?
-
- For two years, he has been The Amazing Spineless Wonder. "Knock this
- chip off my shoulder -- I dare you," he swaggers. Then when it
- happens, he steps back and says, "Oh. Well, actually, I meant this
- other chip."
-
- Then just when we want him to fold like a cheap lawn chair, he finds
- a backbone. But even as Marines were ready to hit the beach, Clinton
- still felt so strongly both ways that he couldn't set a deadline. And
- while he walked all over morale with his cold feet, the White House
- harumphed that this "is no time for a divisive debate."
-
- Senate Majority Leader George Mitchell saved Clinton's assault with a
- technicality to gag debate. Unless he's been absorbed by one of those
- Invasion of the Body Snatchers pods, this is the same Curious George
- who demanded a debate on the Gulf War in 1991, saying, "The grave
- decision for war is being made prematurely." But the rules are
- different now. Clinton promised change in the worst way--and that's
- what we got: a president who makes so many mistakes that his merely
- mediocre stupidities slip through the cracks like a littering ticket
- for Lorena Bobbitt. Just look at the stuff Slick has greased his way
- out of:
-
- A few years ago, peace marchers accused President Bush of trading
- American blood for oil. They predicted another Vietnam and
- humiliating defeat by those "Elite Republican Guards" of Saddam
- Hussein.
-
- Where are the war protesters now? Recovering from Woodstock II?
- Anyone who points out that Clinton is grasping at Haiti like a man
- drowning in the polls is "bashing the president." The same doves who
- were awed by the Republican Guards now say Haiti will be as easy as
- sticking pins in a dictator doll.
-
- During the Bush and Reagan administrations, it would have been a
- megascandal if the president hired a thug to lean on citizens and
- cover up dirt. But when Clinton's former mistresses and bodyguards
- complained that Clinton hired a San Francisco detective to sit on
- "bimbo eruptions" with threats and bribes.. . yawn. Who cares?
-
- Remember the hissy fit when Nancy Reagan wore loaner gowns? The
- ethics cops must have been munching donuts when Clinton mooched whole
- houses. He's the first president to sponge off alleged "friends" by
- panhandling free vacation homes that rent for $4,500 a week,
- according to a Detroit Free Press story. He has stayed in Coronado,
- Calif., Hilton Head, S.C., and Martha's Vineyard, Mass.--but he
- didn't report the freebies, although gifts over $250 must be
- disclosed.
-
- It would be the story of the month it if Dan Quayle "forgot" to
- renew his license to practice law. Bill and Hillary Clinton both
- forgot to pay their $50 fees to the Arkansas State Bar for six
- months. According to a tiny item inside the New York Times, the bar
- has suspended their licenses to practice. Too bad. They may need the
- practice.
-
- When Bush was warming up to liberate Kuwait, he was scorched for
- getting too personal about Saddam. But The Fist of God by Frederick
- Forsyth offers an interesting explanation: Bush knew Saddam was a
- nuclear menace and deliberately provoked him to stay in Kuwait so
- we'd have an excuse to demolish Iraq's nuclear arsenal.
-
- Maybe someday someone will explain the way Clinton backed down when
- North Korea waved nukes in his face.
-
- Instead, the luckiest--or slickest--president is picking on Haiti.
-
- A memo that leaked from a United Nations meeting with Clinton's
- foreign policy crew explains why: "The president's . . . main
- advisers are of the opinion that not only does (invasion) constitute
- the lesser evil, but that it is politically desirable . . . a chance
- to show, after the strong media criticism of the administration, the
- president's decision making capability and the firmness of leadership
- in international matters."
-
- Clinton won't say that now. But he said it on Dec. 3, 1969, in his
- infamous loathing-the-military letter: "Because of my opposition to
- the war, I am in great sympathy with those who are not willing to
- fight, kill and maybe die for their country," he explained.
-
- "The ROTC was the one way left in which I could possibly, but not
- positively, avoid both Vietnam and resistance," he wrote, "for one
- reason: to maintain my political viability within the system."
-
- As we used to say in 1969, what goes around comes around. Clinton is
- talking us into a war now for the same reason he talked himself out
- of one 25 years ago: to maintain his political viability.
-
- I just hope our soldiers in Haiti are as lucky as Clinton has been at
- dodging when lightning strikes.
-
- Peter Bronson is editorial page editor. If you have comments or
- suggestions, call him at 768-8301, or write to 312 Elm Street,
- Cincinnati, Ohio 45202.
-
-